Monday, February 25, 2013

Diary 25 feb

Another lame day.. The kids are at school, milady is off trying to get her drivers license. I hope she'll pass.. no wait.. I don't care really..

Today I will try fire making with the friction methods since I failed at making fire with the flint & steel method. I did got some advice to use an old file instead of a knife.. will give this a try later.
The plan is to head into the garden, into the shed and not come out until I get a good ember.
And while I'm at it I can also test my hobo tin cooking set.

I feel tired, very tired.. I guess this is because my future journey is on my mind every day and the whole day.. I just can't seem to give it a rest every now and then. Do I pack enough food? Where will I go? Could this be edible? Is my backpack sturdy enough? or is it too heavy in the longrun?
The part of my brain that has to make decisions is doing overtime and it must be overheated.
Tiredness, a lack of energy, fear of failure and other negativity is trying to get a hold on me..

Now that my days in society are numbered the idea of heading out into the unknown and being all by myself starts to scare me a little for the first time. The only thing that scares me most is staying.
The idea of being completely alone out there is liberating and scary at the same time. I become more and more aware of the possible dangers. Not just physical dangers but mental aswell.

Sometimes I look around me.. I see my girlfriend, her sister, her father, her family, her friends, my neighbours, my daughter's teacher.. I realised I got to know quite a lot of people over the past years. They are all strangers to me, every single one of them. Even people who call me their friend, I have no idea who the hell they are even though they have been visiting us for years. I have nothing in common with these folks. I start to wonder if I will ever find someone that I have at least one thing in common with. All these guys can talk about is their mobile phones, their tablets, their career, their car.. it goes on and on and on.. jesus!

My girlfriend just called.. she passed.. now she is well on her way to get a drivers license and a car.. good for her.

I used to be one of them you know.. I would buy an mp3 player because I thought that would make me happy. After a while the mp3 player was "old" and others convinced me that it was no longer "cool".. The mp3 player did no longer made me happy. Then I bought a new mp3 player thinking "this will make me happy"...
Then I stepped out of this everlasting circle and realised that most people were nothing more but sheep!
Why do I let others tell me what to buy or what is cool? Why do you want to have the same car your neighbour has? Why can't you make up your own mind? You say you are an individual yet you are a sheep! If a 100 guys shout "Go left!" you will go left..    Sheep I tell ya, SHEEP!!! Bèhhhhh...!

Hahaha, I'm just kidding you guys. But there is some truth to this story. We should often ask ourselves why we buy so much stuff. Do you realy need it or did you just buy it to be "hip like others". And who cares what others think. People should like you for who you are not for what you own.. remember.. be yourself, don't follow the herd ;)

That's it for now. Time for the song of the day

Red Hot Chillie Peppers - Under the bridge 


  1. I wonder.. I think I'm going to gather a small group of people (maybe only 1, maybe only 2) so this thing I'm going to do is much more.. Social. If you know what I mean. I'm afraid it'll get plain old boring when I go on my own after a while. Company might be a good idea, I'm not sure yet.

  2. That is not a bad idea at all. As a matter of fact that is a much better idea then going alone.
    I will go alone because of several reasons.. Because I want to see what it's like to be completely alone, to clear my head and it's also a kind of a social experiment but also simply because finding a group of people who want to join you is very hard. Only a handfull of people worldwide are seriously willing to do this.

    If you can find or create such a group then that's great! Living in the wilderness would be easier, also when it comes to safety..
    If I would brake a leg while walking the open plains of Siberia then I am pretty much screwed. With a small group you can watch out for eachother.

    So yeah it is a good idea, go for it :)

  3. I've read that you're a 'natural loner'. Well, so am I, kind of. I like company, but I don't need it. I don't depend on socialness. I'll do a few test-trips before I'll go on my huge one, my how-long-can-I-do-this-trip. Those test trips will be both with and without groups. I'll see what I like the most.

    Do whatever you feel like will be necessary. I like the idea of going alone, I am however kinda scared that at one point I stop enjoying it and start being lonely.

    On a final note, this blog and especially commenting on it has made me realise that I want to start a blog about such things myself too. Discuss what's on my mind, not specifically for an audience.

    I'll start my own soon. If you'd like, I'll post the link here when I started it.

    1. Being a loner can be a blessing and a curse. During my journey I will be alone, but if I encounter (friendly) people then I will not hide or anything, this is not an effort to try to flee from humanity.

      Test trips are a good idea. I would love to do the same thing. Head out into the wilderness and live off the land for a weekend, later on for a week, then 2 weeks.. That is a great way to prepare yourself for such a lifestyle or to experiment surten skills.

      Unfortunately It's almost April so i'm running out of time to do that.

      Good luck on your blog, again, I would love to take a visit ;)